the light turns on and I can see it from where I am
I imagine it is your light and I think of you whistling while music plays
the animal jumps down from the tree between our windows
there is a flag in the drawer in the office of the elementary school
I ignore you for a long time but I am thinking about you at all times of day
I buy fast food and then feel sick before eating it
this is the whispered part of what I say to you
when we are holding each other laying on a bed with the lights off
don’t worry™ about it
don’t think about it all that is gone now all that is gone
I am the national reserve and I am burning
and all the love™ inside me burns like money
in small fires spread throughout the larger fire
then I miss you because I have nothing left
the chainsaw touches the log and the birds take off from the trees
a small dog scratches at a door and the owner comes over to let it out
it’s alright™ put soap on it and scrub gently
watch it touch the sink and go into the pipes
Tom Cruise sits at a dinner table with his family talking about junk food
the body of water touches rocks and air at the same time
there is a noise coming from under the leather
Whoopi Goldberg sticks out her tongue
while she moves her eyebrows and shoulders
the sun is going down the sun is growing gowns and
a face touches the bushes
those gummy worms are motionless and slightly melted on the sidewalk
this is a sad™ day with a few smiles spread throughout
a car dropped on another car in the dump behind the
meadow at the foot of the mountain
it is a cartoon piano falling from the harness down to the street
where we stand embracing
there are many parts
but oh well I guess
it is out of our hands
thank goodness™
where are you
come here
I wish I you could hear me thinking of you
so I knew I could hide nothing and just move on
Tom Cruise has skin that is a boundary separating him from the rest of us
the satellite circles far off all I want to see is you nearing
maybe thinking about finding me where I am
product launches are our sacred gatherings
we have nothing else so powerful and unifying
I struggle to find happiness™ in this mess
I struggle to find energy and happiness™
and I am angry™ and sad™ most of it
there is joy™ in that but it is second rate
trust me
because I still miss you I wish you loved™ me too but I know
things don’t work that way for most of it
I stand on the earth with my hand blocking the sun scanning for you
someone stands near a tree looking up at the leaves moving
the horse pulls the wagon on the dirt road
I am thinking about you silently
I walk around a building and think about you
the sweater touches my neck where the t-shirt isn’t
I imagine you sliding down the banister but nothing happens
Tom Cruise stands in front of his gold plated closet
thinking about what to wear
there is a long day ahead he sighs and buttons up his shirt
a tree with no leaves between a fence and the highway
I brush my hand against your hand and get nervous™ the red table cloth moves a little and you are whistling a melody of a popular song
all of us are in for it that is one thing we share
while we feel so lonely™ and untouched and while we don’t
stomp on it
put that fire out and start a new one
between the clouds and the land
I am the president of my inner life I impeach myself and appoint you
but you turn down the offer and order me to take control of myself
there is a double-decker bus turning a corner while
the mother pushes the stroller out of the building next to the road
I leave you behind and jog
I regret™ it
do you understand how this happens
I have a sensation of nothingness™ inside me and I forget how to speak